Writing a paper and thinking it through...

I really need to be working on my paper, but I just can't seem to make it happen. So I am going to use this blog to talk my way through some thoughts, and see what I get. Far warning...

I decided to write this paper about self-talk. You would think I have plenty to say; in all actuality, I do. I would say that everyday, in every situation there is always something going through my head saying you are not good enough, why are you doing that, you should try harder, just give up already. I bet if I took a poll right now, I would not be alone. I would guess that at some point or another, more than 90% of you would have thought something about yourself today that needed more consideration.


I think it is safe to say that we all struggle with something. Some people struggle with weight (check), some struggle with money (check), some struggle with an addiction (check), some struggle with perfection or the lack thereof (check and check). When you struggle with something often times there is a conversation to resolve or move on from said struggle. Some of us have friends or family that we can talk to about the struggles in life. Some of us feel comfortable talking about some things but possibly not all things with friends or family. Some us don’t feel we have that outlet and while others may judge us for that, it simply is. This is where self-talk comes into play. When we don’t have an outlet, or won’t use one, we turn inward. We criticize or try to rationalize our behaviors. We work our way through what is right or wrong, why it is right or wrong, and where we go from there. While we work through those ideas we narrate the story as it was, as it is, and how it should be. In the end we come to an expression of that dialogue. It is an expression of who we are, where we have been and where we will go.

While I think the majority of things that go through our heads are struggles, complaints and the like, I don’t think they necessarily have to be negative. I think every once in a while a good thought slips through. Things like, way to go!, that looks awesome, keep it up, or you are doing great. I would argue that these are few and far between but what if they didn’t have to be, what if they weren’t?

In order to get to this point I think we need to look at what happens when we consider, what process occurs within ourselves that allows us to get to or through the situation. Self-narrative is exactly that, the consideration process. It begins with cognitive disonance, the uneasy feeling between what you think and what you do, which leads to internal dialogue (intrapersonal communication) in the form of a critic or rationalizer, ending with self-expression, the way you present what it is you haved discussed with yourself to the world.

So lets break each piece down and see what we come up with, a paper perhaps?

Anyway, off to finish the works. Thanks for letting me work this out and if you read this let me know your thoughts.

Quick catch up...

So I dont have much, but here is a quick recap of the last couple of weeks.

2 weeks ago had surgery. Gall bladder out and some exploratory. Stayed with my parents because they knew if they left me alone I would miss behave. I was also on some pretty amazing drugs that would knock me out in about five minutes. Cant do any working out for 6 weeks, BOO! But I can eat EVERYTHING! Spicy, sweet, dairy, it is great!

Trying to keep myself busy with not eating or cooking. Been watchin a ton of movies and loving the great movies of years past. Some of them were a little twilight zonish, others were just flat out hysterical, there were some sad ones and some I just couldnt get into. Thank you Tina for letting me borrow some great flicks.

Elane got to go to the KC Zoo, dont tell anyone but we prefer the one in Saint Louis. We are thinking about tracking up north to hit the other big one, blame it on anesthesia brain that I cant remember the name. She loved the polar bear and the baboons and the giraffe's.

Took a treck up to Saint Louis for the celebrations of birthdays. Toni's July 1st, mine July 2nd and Grandpa's on July 3rd. It was great, like a mini family reunion. Aunt's and Uncle's we havent seen in years all got together.

Got to go back to work on Thursday, THANK GOD for being out of the apartment and mobile! I can only take so much of sitting around. Wishin I could have used the vacation for a real vacation but just means I will have to make next years far more exciting :D

Toni and Steve got another puppy last week. His name is Mac. He is a boxer puppy with white base and brown spots. He kind of looks like a paint puppy. The coolest part is his eyes. One is bright sky blue and the other is like a green color. His head is HUGE! He is definitely a cutie and will melt the hearts of all.

I am inheriting two cats for a while because Ms. Jean and Mr. Roy are moving to Florida. I will miss them immensely but I am glad they will get to relax and enjoy life, probably by the poolside, ARGH! Just kidding. It will be nice to have a few friends staying with me for a while and even better is that I can then take vacations to FLORIDA!  Oh yeah :D

So anyway, I think I got you all caught up. Hope you are all well, please let me know.